The "Impotence" of Proofreading

The the impotence of proofreading
By Taylor Mali
www.taylormali.com

Has this ever happened to you?
You work very horde on a paper for English clash
And then get a very glow raid (like a D or even a D=)
and all because you are the word¹s liverwurst spoiler.
Proofreading your peppers is a matter of the the utmost impotence.

This is a problem that affects manly, manly students.
I myself was such a bed spiller once upon a term
that my English teacher in my sophomoric year,
Mrs. Myth, said I would never get into a good colleague.
And that¹s all I wanted, just to get into a good colleague.
Not just anal community colleague,
because I wouldn¹t be happy at anal community colleague.
I needed a place that would offer me intellectual simulation,
I really need to be challenged, challenged dentally.
I know this makes me sound like a stereo,
but I really wanted to go to an ivory legal collegue.
So I needed to improvement
or gone would be my dream of going to Harvard, Jail, or Prison
(in Prison, New Jersey).

So I got myself a spell checker
and figured I was on Sleazy Street.

But there are several missed aches
that a spell chukker can¹t can¹t catch catch.
For instant, if you accidentally leave a word
your spell exchequer won¹t put it in you.
And God for billing purposes only
you should have serial problems with Tori Spelling
your spell Chekhov might replace a word
with one you had absolutely no detention of using.
Because what do you want it to douch?
It only does what you tell it to douche.
You¹re the one with your hand on the mouth going clit, clit, clit.
It just goes to show you how embargo
one careless clit of the mouth can be.

Which reminds me of this one time during my Junior Mint.
The teacher read my entire paper on A Sale of Two Titties
out loud to all of my assmates.
I¹m not joking, I¹m totally cereal.
It was the most humidifying experience of my life,
being laughed at pubically.

So do yourself a flavor and follow these two Pisces of advice:
One: There is no prostitute for careful editing.
And three: When it comes to proofreading,
the red penis your friend.

10/15/09 (I Cant Think Of Any Clever Titles At The Moment..Sorry)

It feels like Im lying but I promise to start updating more regularly=]
Schools been going really well so far. The teachers are great, the kids are hilarious and the hw is drain, everythings going right. I'm passing all my classes except maybe, Physics. My teacher has the craziest accent and he likes to take to himself so the class is entertaining but you leave at the end of the period trying to figure out what you were supposed to learn in those late 50 minutes. Its alright though, I'm gonna start going to tutoring after school next week. I ran for Student Union and won! Woot! Its been rumored that Ive got Presidency of the Student Union but Im not sure how reliable my source is. All I know is that there are four seats and I got one of them. For now, thats all I need to know. Im taking Intro to Latin and I LOVE my latin teacher...he is too awesome. He actually makes me want to continue latin as a language course but I believe I'm going to switch to either Spanish or Chinese. Im not sure yet. I will be taking intro to both of those and afterwards I'll decide which language I want to continue taking for the next two years. Yeah, thats really all I have so far. Ive got an essay to write on The Scarlet Letter (thank you Mr.Kleiman for having already introduced me to Puritan times. Made this book alot easier) Yeah, Im gonna go get started on that essay. I'll post it up here when I finish. Update you guys a little later..(a little later as in tomorrow=] lol )

WOOT!
Signing off and out'^.^'

OOIT OOIT!!

So Ive graduated from middle school, entering highschool in about a week, Ive learned so much about myself this summer and one thing Ive realized is that I REALLY need to start blogging again, lol. I miss seeing that blank page fill up with words that write out my thoughts, thoughts that I'd probably be either keeping inside or telling my dog and he rarely responds so I gets the feeling he doesnt really care...that couldnt be true though, could it?.....NAH..yup, so anyway..thats it. Look at this blog post as an intro for whats coming..yup, thats right. BEWARE!! Wait..beware sounds scary, like I dont want you to read my blog..ok, nevermind. WELCOME!!..Yeah, that works.

JAMAICA!WOO!

SO PROUD....

SEXTING

Teenagers. One big thing...sex. As much as some teens try to act like they're all so holy and they don't think about it...they do. Unless you live under a rock sex affects you. Every where you go there's sex. Movies, music, the rack at the corner store that says 18+. Its everywhere. If its everywhere then it must be good, must be important for some kind of fundamental development right? Another big thing is cell phones and on cell phones, theres texting. Everybody does it. Now if you put this texting that everybody does with the sex that everybodys talking about, you get a big problem. Since 2005, *"sexting"* has been a big issue and...well, its still a big problem. If you're not familiar with the term sexting, its the act of sending sexually explicit messages or photos electronically, primarily between cell phones. Since many teens are still trying to keep some type of purity, they figure not having actual sex but sending sexually explicit messages to the "loves of their lives" is a good alternative. The same as if you'd have sex with somebody who you "loved" and thought "loved" you back and then they go around telling everybody youre a whore and the biggest slut after the innevitable happens and you two break up...if you send them either sexually explicit text or pictures youre just cutting out the middle man and basically giving them permission to hit that "SEND-TO-MANY" button on their phone and letting everybody else see what should've been private and letting everybody think all thats not true about you also.

Click Here to read about a young girl that commited suicide because of the consequences of sexting
Click Here to read more about the subject

Watch what you do. Once something is sent theres no turning back and nothing is ever deleted from cyberspace.

Teletubies Vs. Boobah

Yeah, so Ive been obssesing over this for the past few days. You know how there are reality shows that just copy other reality shows and 6 soap operas that are exactly the same but with different actors? Well they do that with kids shows too. I am not embarrasesd to say this at all, I spend most of my free time watching PBS and PLayhouse disney and all those other channels for the young ones. Now my problem is that one of my past favorites, Teletubies was copied by this thing, Boobah. Honestly I have no idea where they got a name like that. Boobah...I just dont get it. Theyre such copy cats. Boobah characters; They are all different colors, they dont talk, they dance constantly....what does that remind you of.....TELETUBIES! I cant believe the shows creator had the audacity to sit there and remake Teletubies. Most people say its just the chinese version but what 6 year old is concerned with race. What 6 year child tells their mother "This show isnt chinese enough for me to watch." Nothing said is about being racist, Im not even trying to make a "racial statement". What my problem is that they copied Teletubies and Im mad. I hope Boobah looses all their viewers and is canceled or put on some remote channel. (They scare me......Im serious, I really am afraid of them. Especially the yellowish one.)

[ Oh Digimon and Pokemon are the exact same thing just so you know...I love both of them though. Gotta catch 'em all!]

Sabrina's Home For Imaginary Friends

Is it really wrong to have an imaginary friend? I don’t think so but I’ve promised myself to never go down that road again. This is why (flashback!)……I went to the Bronx with a couple of my friends (3 girls, 2 boys (and my imaginary friend, Moonlight) to get hoodies that had our groups intials. So we went and got hoodies, found these sneakers that had the hoodies design, went to the movies and then hit the pizzaria. It was pretty late, almost 11 so we decided to go back to Brooklyn to my cousins house. We took the 2 train and it took forever but there were some teens on the train that were really social so it was like a traveling party after awhile. We hit our stop and got off. We checked to make sure we had all our stuff. My little group didn’t forget nothing but guess what I forgot….Moonlight. I had a mental breakdown right in the subway station. She was like my twin. They couldn’t get me to calm down. I was crying like someone just shot my dog. It was horrible and I vowed from that day forward that all imaginary friends were to be completely oblivious to me as they are to adults who don’t believe in their inner child til! I found Moonlight. I hold that til this day…..please do not introduce me to any of your imaginary friends. Theyll be alot more imaginary when Im done with them….